More to It: Reframing Emotions

In this live event recording, the counselors answer questions submitted by our podcast audience, including how to move forward from emotional trauma experiences, how to navigate emotional complexity in intense seasons of grief, and how to engage our emotional curiosity to benefit ourselves and others.

Reframing how we respond to our emotions is slow work. It involves our minds, hearts, and bodies, and it involves our communities.

Joy is not an emotion but a state of being. We receive it from God, and we cultivate it—on our own and in community—through orienting toward God and what He says is true, in both our happiness and sadness.

Depression amplifies existing emotions. Depression tells us that whatever we perceive as bleak or sad or utterly hopeless will always be bleak and sad and hopeless. When that occurs, we may need a different perspective that helps us reframe what we’re feeling and what we’re going through.

Anxiety is an appropriate feeling when we encounter situations—known or as yet unknown—that seem impossible to endure. The counselors point to Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane. As He considered the cross, He agonized. Yet Jesus’ anxiety never controlled His actions.

Left unchecked, jealousy spawns feelings of resentment, anger, shame, and bitterness. It whispers, “If I had this one thing, I would be happy. I would be content.” But one thing turns into many, none of them able to satisfy our hungry hearts and souls.

Grief is an ongoing process as we reckon with the reality of loss. Grief also serves as an invitation to know Jesus, the Man of Sorrows (Isaiah 53). To Jesus, grief was productive. It both acknowledged the limitations of the human frame and proclaimed confidence in God.

We don’t always know what our anger indicates in the moment. We need a community that will sit with us in our anger and invite us to consider what it’s telling us. Discovering the emotions behind our anger is hard work, but it’s essential to understanding ourselves and working toward a life in which anger does not overwhelm us.

Pride says we have everything under control. We are the masters of our destinies. Pride separates us from God and one another. Confidence differs from pride. Humble confidence results from dependence on God. It gives us a category for navigating our imperfections, limitations, and inadequacies.

Fear is normal, and some fears are good. Fearing God, for instance, cultivates godly courage within us. And yet, fear occasionally crushes us. We need people who will help us slow down and sit with us until we’re calm enough to begin evaluating what makes us afraid.