The Selfish Woman

One of the questions I get asked the most, is this:  How do I stop caring what people think???  I'm bringing some tough love, so put on your big girl pants and let's go!  Join The Phoenix Membership  Work with me 1:1   

Who knew that a three minute video could create such a heated debate between the sexes....about sex!  My TikTok video that went viral a couple of weeks ago has resonated with women and angered men.  Why? What is it about women being honest about the reasons they've lost interest in sex that is so polarizing?  Join me for a deep dive!  Busting some of the common myths about sex in relationships  Survey says! What women are saying about it!  What your lack of interest in the bedroom is showing you about what's happening outside the bedroom  The one significant contributing factor to your lack of interest  What to do about it!  Watch the viral video that started it all  Join The Phoenix Membership  Check out my programs and offers   

How do you heal?  The journey of healing is a deeply personal one that requires trial and error, willingness to fail, and finding your guides along the way.  Crystal Allon has been documenting her healing journey on Tik Tok and inviting her community into the process in real time.  Her vulnerability, realness and curiosity are refreshing and I know you will relate to her story on many levels.  TW: suicide, abuse, substance use  Some of the topics we discuss:  when adult kids go no contact with their parents taking ownership of the impact we have had on our kids  healing trauma from childhood  healing from depression, fear and anger  learning to forgive yourself for the past  Settle in and enjoy this deeply real conversation!   

You know that bitch inside your head that keeps telling you to stay quiet, be nice, don't rock the boat and DEFINITELY don't say no if it's gonna upset someone else?  Yeah, you know.  Well today, it's time to learn what's really going on, why you even have an inner bitch, and what to do about it.  Amy Green Smith is here to rock your world and set you straight about how to get your power back, communicate with clarity, and have big fucking boundaries.  Not only that, she's giving you specific, real life examples of what to say in those situations where you don't know what to say!  We also chat about:  how doing the makeup for her dead Dad was the wake-up call she needed why 'Declaring the Do-Over' is going to free you from guilt  the real reason you're a people pleaser (which will set you free)  how to get yourself out of any conversation you don't want to have  Amy is the compassionate voice of truth that we all need in our lives!  Grab Amy's free stuff here!  http://amygreensmith.com/free And as always, please subscribe, share and leave a review!   

One year ago I got my divorce papers in the mail.  At the time it was a monumentous occasion! I celebrated big time!  Now, one year later, it's a distant memory.  I'm in a completely different place and the struggle, heartbreak, grief and fear are a thing of the past.  In this episode, I'm sharing four big lessons I learned about going through a big life transition, and why they're critical for you as you face life's challenges.    Want ongoing coaching, accountability & support as you navigate transition and change? Join The Phoenix Membership! We meet twice each month on zoom for group coaching calls, you get access to our private FB community, and you get my most popular courses for free! All for a super low cost!  Join The Phoenix    Make sure to join Divorce Support for Women on FB!    Check out my website for all programs and courses!   

"I sure hope this year will be better than last year!"  Sound familiar?  If so, you're leaving your life to fate. Hoping that some external force will intervene on your behalf and magically make your problems disappear and bring you what you want.  Not gonna happen!  It's time to take fate into your own damn hands!  Your dream life will NOT just land in your lap, and this year it's time to make it happen, and I'm here to support you!  So instead of leaving your life to fate, I'm telling you what you need to do instead.  FATE  - reinvented.  Subscribe, share and leave a review!!!  Join Burning Woman on FB for support on growth, healing and transformation  Join Divorce Support for Women on FB for community & coaching  Join Phoenix Membership Group for ongoing monthly coaching 

If you want 2024 to be YOUR year for a big breakthrough, you've gotta fight for it! And I'm here to help you get it!  Don't leave this year to chance and just accept whatever comes your way.  Get clear on what you want, why you want it, and how you're going to get it.  In this episode, I'm giving you straight talk (as always) about what's required to get the breakthrough you need to get what you want.  What is a breakthrough? What's been holding you back from big results  What's required to get your desires  How to take charge of your life  My story of a breakthrough I had recently  Please subscribe, share, and leave a review!  Join Burning Woman FB Community  Join The Phoenix Membership Club  Jill's podcast episode about her experience at the Retreat   

Are you just holding on, waiting for the holidays to be over so that you can restart in January?  Life is challenging, painful, and difficult, and you're feeling discouraged and wondering when it will be YOUR turn to get what you want.  Maybe you're holding on to hope that things will get better.  Or maybe you're holding on to the threads of your sanity!!!  Whatever's going on for you, if you're struggling or feeling challenged in life these days, I have a message for you.  I'm sharing - from my heart to yours - what I want you to know that will give you strength, change your perspective on your situation, and remind you that you will be not only okay, but you will soar!  Love you! xo

The relationship is over and before you can even change your status on Facebook to 'single', you see it....the picture of him with someone new. Your heart drops into your stomach, tears fill your eyes, and rage makes your head feel like it's going to explode.  How could he move on so fast???  Why? What does it mean? How do you process this?  Grab a drink, settle in and let's get you sorted!  Remember to subscribe, share, and leave a review!     

If your life is spinning out of control, everything is moving fast, and you wonder, 'What's the point?' this episode is for you!  It can be hard to connect to your purpose when life moves so fast. The days fly by; you're going through the motions, getting things done, but why? What's it all for?  This episode will revolutionize your perspective on finding and living your purpose!  I talked with Candis Williams about her Slow Year and how it changed her life. She shares her story of slowing down and the dramatic and powerful shifts that allowed her to find her purpose and passion in unexpected ways.  At the end of 2021, Candis embarked on a year of profound transformation that she dubbed The Slow Year and now shares the stories, principles and practices that underpinned this life-changing year through her speaking and coaching programs.  Candis currently hosts a travel show for Carnival Cruise Line, where she explores local culture, cuisine and experiences at various cruise destinations in the Caribbean Sea.  www.candiswilliams.com www.theslowyear.com  

I spent two weeks in Italy this summer, travelling alone, and I learned so many lessons about myself, and about life. I'm sharing my biggest take aways with you, because I know you'll be able to relate! Settle in, get cozy and let's chat!  (sorry about the terrible audio, I had to record this on my phone)  Interested in joining Women Rising? Check out all the details:  https://subscribepage.io/9sR8pI Join me on Substack!  https://substack.com/@valjones  

She's baaaack!!!!!  Kate Anthony is back and bringing the truth bombs in this incredible episode!  You may remember Kate from Episode 39 (if not, make sure to listen!), and now she's back because her new book, The D Word, is hitting the shelves, and we have much to discuss!  The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage is Kate's incredible book, all about divorce and navigating the choppy waters of this enormous decision. It's a user's guide to divorce...before, during and after.  We talk, laugh and commiserate on so many topics, including:  setting boundaries with your partner while you're figuring out whether to stay or leave why married men are the happiest demographic, and why married women are the least happy  some of the major contributing factors to why women leave  the different ways that women carry most of the burdens in the marriage  the different ways that men are participating (or not) in every aspect of the relationship  the hilarious perspective that Kate relied on in the year after her divorce that kept her from making big mistakes!  Kate Anthony is the author of The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage, host of the critically acclaimed and New York Times recommended podcast The Divorce Survival Guide and creator of the groundbreaking online program Should I Stay or Should I Go? which helps women make the most difficult decision of their lives. Kate is certified as a Domestic Violence Advocate, a Co-Parenting Specialist, and a High Conflict Divorce Coach.  You can find Kate at www.kateanthony.com      

Sometimes you just need a little magic.  That's exactly what today's guest, NYT best selling author Anna Kloots, discovered when her marriage ended and she found herself alone and struggling to start over.  Don't miss this poignant, vulnerable and heart felt conversation with Anna as we dive into her latest book, My Own Magic: A Reappearing Act.  We discuss:  how to find the courage to start over when everything has fallen apart what she learned about giving to others while also going through the darkest time of her life  how she creates joy and celebrates each day, every day  how moving to Paris gave her everything she needed   what you need to do, right now, to begin your own journey of magic  Anna Kloots is a New York Times bestselling author who always dreamed of being a Disney princess. Her writing candidly reflects on her travels, relationships, failures, and fantasies, and it may inspire you to move to Paris, like she did.  https://www.annakloots.com/

Sexual dynamics between men and women are complicated! It can seem like one big cosmic joke when we try to figure out how to have a healthy, thriving, mutually satisfying sex life.  If you're in a heterosexual relationship, or you would like to be, this episode is going to change your life!  I talk with Irene Fehr about why so many women believe they are 'broken' and need to 'fix themselves' when it comes to sex, and what is really going on in the bedroom that leads to a breakdown in intimacy.  We get into all the juicy details, including:  why so many women believe they are 'the problem' what to do when you have no time or energy for sex  what the key nutrients are for cultivating intimacy  why being selfish leads to satisfying sex!  Irene Fehr, MA, CPCC, SEP, is a Sex & Intimacy Coach who helps couples make love and sex work in a long-term relationship and bring sex and passion into a sexless one. Irene's views on women's libido and intimacy have been featured in HuffPost, Cosmopolitan, Shape, Refinery29, ScaryMommy, Elite Daily and Bustle. She is no stranger to her client's issues, having recovered from the all-too-common story of 'happy marriage turned sexless' when she lost her libido - all before turning 30.  https://www.irenefehr.com

If your fear of failing is keeping you playing small in your life, this episode is for you!  Failure is part of the equation of success and if you're not willing to fail you will never get the success you want and deserve. Life is asking you to swing for the fences and get messy!  I'm taking you through my own experience of 'failing' in real time, and sharing my strategies for using failure as fuel to live an intuitive, passionate life.  I'm also giving you my one, simple strategy to use when you fail, that will shift the energy around it and allow your subconscious mind to release the fear and resistance, so you can continue to take the action you know you need to be doing!  Want in on the next round of Women Rising? Here's the Waitlist!  https://subscribepage.io/UaXIuq Want to work with me? Check out my programs and book a Discovery Call  https://www.valeriejonescoach.com

It's time to become the Queen of your life, especially with money!  Becoming empowered with money requires you to change your inner relationship with money first. That's where it all starts. Your energy, your beliefs, your feelings around money....I'm talking about it all!  What does it mean to be in Princess energy? See where this might be showing up for you! What does it mean to be in Queen energy? Why is this so important when it comes to money?  How to take your throne!  Let's do this!  Want to join Audacity Collective and get in on monthly coaching?  Join here!  The link to the money course I mention in this episode:  www.dowjanes.com Check out my website for courses, programs, testimonials and more!  www.valeriejonescoach.com    

This is one of the most requested topics I get asked to speak about, so let's do this!  Imposter Syndrome is inevitable if you're going for more, breaking the rules, rocking the boat and getting out of status quo. And, if you're a woman, you are twice as likely to experience it.  So what do you do when Imposter Syndrome rears it's head and has you staying small and running for the hills?  Here's what I'm getting into:  what is Imposter Syndrome? why are you experiencing it?  my theory on why women experience it more than men  my own experiences!   I'm giving you my strategies to overcome it's grip on your life  Stop allowing Imposter Syndrome to keep you from your purpose and destiny. It's time to rise up and become the woman you are meant to be, so you can create the life you are meant to live!  Check out all my programs here:  https://www.valeriejonescoach.com Register for the free Goals with Soul Summit here:  http://mskatehouse.com/goalswithsoulsummit-val    

Are you sitting on the fence in some area of your life?  Stuck in indecision? One foot in, one foot out, and waiting for something to happen that will kick you into action?  Sitting on the fence can seem like the safest choice, but let's face it, it sucks and it hurts your ass!  You are getting nowhere fast.  It's time to get off the f**king fence and take action!  I'm bringing you my Top Ten List for getting off the fence.  Bring your journal, it's go time!  If you've been sitting on the fence about joining the Women's Retreat in June, consider this your sign to register!  Sign up here  Want an ongoing kick in the pants to keep you motivated and inspired? Subscribe to Audacity, my monthly membership group!  Details here  For all other info on programs, courses and to book a free Discovery Call, visit my website: https://www.valeriejonescoach.com    

I'm coming in hot off the Midlife Reinvention Workshop, and sharing some of the questions the women brought to the call because I know you'll be able to relate!  What does it look like to be a Selfish Woman every day?  I'm giving you two practical ways you can do this!  Here are all the links to the resources I mention on this episode: June 2023 Women's Retreat My free FB Community:  Audacity Monthly Membership   Check out my website for Boundaries Bootcamp and all other links and resources!   

WTF is inner child work...and why does it matter?  There's a lot of confusion around the term 'inner child'. It can seem 'woo woo', weird, mysterious, or intimidating to consider that you have a little kid inside of you somewhere!  Add in things like 'healing' or 'work' and it gets even weirder!  Whether you're familiar with it or have never heard of it, I'm getting into what it's all about and why it matters to you.  what does 'inner child' really mean? how your inner child affects you on a daily basis, and makes most of your decisions  the reasons that your relationship with your inner child is such a big deal  simple ways to begin inner child work for yourself  Let's get into it!  Come to the Retreat in June 2023  https://subscribepage.io/uQSw5P Join Audacity Membership Group!  https://subscribepage.io/4M2VOU