Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship is THE podcast for nuanced advice about managing the ups and downs of friendship. As seen in The Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, Time Magazine, and elsewhere, listeners appreciate Nina's practical take on friendship issues. Are you the friend who ALWAYS reaches out first? Or is your friend more invested in the friendship than you are? Why didn't your friend text you back? How do you take a casual friendship to the next level? These questions come up no matter your age and background. Friendship is tricky, even for grownups. Since 2014, Nina Badzin has been fostering discussions about the nitty gritty of adult friendships with sensitivity and practicality in her friendship advice column. Friendship is an endless, timeless, fascinating topic, and the more anonymous letters she receives, the more she learns about being a better friend and having better friends. Nina loves hearing from readers and listeners. Her work on friendship is meant to be a conversation, and she hopes you will share your thoughts with her and with each other. CONNECT WITH NINA ON ALL THINGS FRIENDSHIP: "Conversations About Friendship" the Substack newsletter about friendship & more is at dearnina.substack.com Instagram & TikTok @dearninafriendship JOIN the Dear Nina Facebook group by searching "Dear Nina: The Group" All links: linktr.ee/ninabadzin

Episodes

Talking to Friends About Sex at Any Age

It's not uncommon to discuss our sex lives with friends during the adolescent and college years. But as we age, it becomes less comfortable. Trust and privacy (of our partner) can be significant barriers to discussing intimate details as well as a fear that friends will judge our issues, desires, and choices.

Dr. Arielle Buch-Frohlich, a clinical psychologist specializing in sex and couples...

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While friendship is an essential type of connection at every age and the one area of personal growth I discuss most often on Dear Nina, today’s guest, psychologist Dr. Adam Dorsay, expands the conversation to the four types of connections we need to lead fulfilling lives. Those four areas are: connection to ourselves, to others, to the world, and to something greater. 

Dr. Adam, author of Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the 4 Ty...

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It's time for the next Dear Nina Friendship Monthly Challenge! The January challenge was to see a friend in person, which meant reaching out to make a plan. The February challenge is to start a ritual/tradition with friends to strengthen new relationships or maintain existing ones.

For accountability, report back in the Dear Nina Facebook Group, on Substack, or via email when you've made the plan. It's okay if the plan d...

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Do you know someone who has adopted a "sober curious" lifestyle? Perhaps it's a pivot you've been considering for yourself? The term is usually credited to Ruby Warrington, author of Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol.

“Sober curious” means you're curious about how much you're drinking and how your health, rela...

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It's the middle of January 2025. Right now you might have friends in Southern California who have evacuated from their homes. You might know someone whose house, entire neighborhood, community, and school are gone. And there's often a time in life when you know someone in a health, personal, or other kind of crisis, even if it's not a situation as drastic as this one where it's so many friends, acquaintances, and fe...

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You've had a tremendous loss in your personal life and your friends don't know what to say or do: Do you tell them what you need, or do you assume they should know? Here's the more important question---Do any of us know what to say and do in every situation? Probably not. And the truth is, not everybody wants the same thing when they're grieving or struggling. What worked for one friend might not work for another. W...

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It's the monthly friendship challenge! And it doesn't matter which month you begin. Every social wellness challenge in 2025 WILL improve your friendships because it puts you in charge of your social life. The January 2025 challenge is to see a friend in person this month. Go for a walk, meet for a meal, see Wicked. It doesn't matter what you do as long as it gets you OFF the text thread and out of the social media "...

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Welcome to the top episode on Dear Nina in 2024—the 14-day friendship cleanse, brainchild Anna Goldfarb whose book, Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections, is a must read for anyone looking to improve their friendships. Don't feel put off by the word, "cleanse." This discussion is about reconsidering how you're approaching friendships and how you're treating your closest friends. (And that...

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Why does the inner judge in our brains automatically default to negativity? We assume the worst and let our insecurities lead the way. How does this inner judge interfere with our friendships? And what can we do to create curiosity instead of negativity?


Ann Imig, creator and author of LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER, and life coach at Listen Life Coaching, is here with practical tools that will help keep the judge at bay. Ann encourages ...

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I love answering listeners' anonymous friendship dilemmas. It's a letter spotlight episode with three short anonymous letters from listeners with various friendship issues. I did my best to give practical, helpful advice.

The subjects are:

  1. A listener whose friend makes little digs at her friend whenever they shop together.
  2. A listener whose friend always chimes in late to the plan-making in the group text thread then wants ...
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I'm thrilled to welcome friendship experts and comedians Matt Ritter and Aaron Karo of Man of the Year podcast! In honor of these male "chief friendship officers," (their term, which I love!) I'm finally tackling the often-requested topic of platonic relationships. Matt is married and Karo is single so that provided a slightly different point of view, which was helpful.

We also discussed how often you "should be&...

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Friendship breakups are an ageless, universal issue. In my 10 years of writing about friendship and receiving many anonymous letters, I've seen that it makes little difference in the grief process if there was a direct conversation with the friend, a fade out, or an abrupt ghosting. No matter the circumstances, we must take time to heal when a friend is no longer in our lives.

Today's episode is a revisit of my conversation ...

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Are there rules for making plans with friends? Who should be the one to suggest the day, time, and place? If you reach out for plans, should you also throw out some dates that might work? OR, do you wait for the other person to "prove" their interest by offering some dates on the calendar?

The short answer: there are no rules.

The longer answer (only 16 minutes), is this week's episode-- "Rules for Making Plans With F...

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Being generous in our friendships makes us better friends and keeps solid friends in our lives. We're not talking about money here! To quote this week's guest, relationship-based therapist and author, Emma Nadler, "When we act more generously we feel better. So there's a lot in it for you, too." We discussed Emma's top five ways to be a more generous friend, and I added one of mine to the list. So yes, in 29...

  • What if your next good friend is an old friend who drifted away from your life for reasons of circumstance and not personality or hurt feelings? If you're in a stage of life where you're lonely, you've moved, or you simply want to shake up your social life, your next solid friendship might be waiting for you in "the past." Yes, reviving old friendships could be the missing piece in your current friendships. Mayb...

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    "Social" prescriptions from your doctor? Yes! What if for the sake of our mental and physical health doctors wrote prescriptions for cycling groups, fishing clubs, or volunteer positions on a farm? Those are real scenarios in Julia Hotz's THE CONNECTION CURE: The Prescriptive Power of Movement, Nature, Art, Service and Belonging, "the first book exploring the science, stories, and spread of social prescribing."

    I...

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    "Many friends are entering the empty nest phase of their lives and some are really dreading it. Celebrities like Brooke Shields share on social media how they aren't ready. Planning ahead by embracing new hobbies and friendships can help change the focus during this major life shift." 

    Those words are from guests Dara Collins and Donna Kassman, queens of mahjong and canasta. Maybe a game is not your thing, that's oka...

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    What a thrill to interview author and journalist Allison Gilbert, who met with Dr. Ruth Westheimer, of blessed memory, every week for a year during what would be the last year of Dr. Ruth's life. Together they worked on Dr. Ruth's final book, The Joy of Connections: 100 Ways to Beat Loneliness and Live a Happier and More Meaningful Life.

    Dr. Ruth was determined to help people suffering from loneliness and dysfunctional frien...

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    Today's "Quick Friendship Tip" is about how to capture the attitude and spirit of that special "freshman energy" apparent on any college campus in the first three weeks of school when making new friends as an adult.


    There is something real happening in that freshman year, specifically the first three weeks, that is magical for friend making. I saw it while dropping off my son for his freshmen year of college ...

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    Do you know your Enneagram (personality) type and how your core fears and desires impact your friendships? I understood very little about anything Enneagram related before my interview with Christina S. Wilcox, author of Take Care of Your Friends: An Enneagram Guide to Interpersonal Relationships. I still have a lot to learn!


    Consider this episode an introduction to the Enneagram and a reminder that each of us is wired different...

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