They probably should have gone to Barcelona. Approachability: 1/10 ( Super smart film,... more

The Oscar for best use of "star wipe" goes to… Approachability: 9/10 ( It's a... more

Imagine Johnny Depp as a shitty boyfriend Approachability: 3/10 ( Stylish & scary... more

Gimme that old time religion.  Approachability: 8/10 ( Prestige tv series that is... more

God's judgment is clear, but what about OSHA's? Special Guest: Chris Brown (Check out the trailer... more

It was CAPITALISM that killed the beast. Approachability: 7/10 (Legitimate thriller, for a 90-year-old film) Content Warnings: Old-timey misogyny; super... more

I'm sorry, Mr. Burton, but Hollywood has a 4-montage limit. Approachability: 9/10 (More of a lightly-dark comedy about vampires than... more

Cook like an Egyptian... Approachability: 8/10 (Gory/bloody but in the most campy way possible) Content Warnings: Stalker/Killer; silly-looking blood Next... more

Your standard Lovecraftian/Modern Dance/Cold War/Divorce Drama Approachability: 3/10 (Brilliant, but a tough watch for the squeamish) Content Warnings: Emotional abuse/manipulation;... more

"Hail to the king, baby" Special Guest: Alex Steed  Approachability: 9/10 (Fantasy action comedy w/vague horror elements) Content Warnings: Cartoonish... more

We have a feeling that this is not at all the final chapter. Special Guest: Dan McCoy https://whiskeyflicks.com/ Approachability: 3/10... more

If by "chopping," you mean "lasers to the face," then yes, this title works. Approachability: 5/10 (Boobs, blood, and beer.... more

Bands today just don't hail satan quite like they used to. Special Guest Brie Williams https://twitter.com/briezillionaire Approachability: 7/10 (Silly and... more

PSA: Don't surprise people with pets as Christmas gifts Approachability: 7/10 (Silly but still scary ) Content Warnings: Jump scares;... more

That's not a Christmas movie… THIS is a Christmas movie. Approachability: 8/10 (Beautifully-shot slow-burn drama) Content Warnings: Non-simulated animal death;... more

The weirdest episode of LOVE IT OR LIST IT ever Special Guest: Sarah Maria Griffin  Approachability: 1/10 (Holiday Inn Express... more

Dr. Carl Hill was a Head of his time. Approachability: 2/10 (Your standard Lovecraftian body-horror gross-out comedy) Content Warnings: Body... more

A tour-de-force by America's Finest Karen Approachability: 6/10 (Campy and low-rent and mostly fun) Content Warnings: Drugging/Sexual Assault; Racist imagery;... more

Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead. Approachability: 1/10 (Super gory zombie apocalypse / Shakespearean tragedy ) Content Warnings: Animal death; Graphic... more

New phone. Who's this? Approachability: 5/10 (Tense (but not overly gory or jumpy) thriller about child abduction.) Content Warnings: Parental... more

Hey Random Horror 9 listeners, so I, Jeffrey Cranor, and Joseph Fink have a brand new fiction podcast. It's the... more

Who's a good boy? Is it you? It IS you! Approachability: 3/10 (It’s a war movie but with werewolves.) Content... more

A post-WWII German village in Chile? That seems perfectly fine, and not sinister at all. Approachability: 9/10 (Beautiful, stunning arthouse... more

Please. Call me Sam. Mister Hain was my father. Approachability: 4/10 (Not a lot of scares. But plenty of weird/gory... more

Leave the horse. Take the clown truck. Special Guests: Jonny & Aileen of ¡Uy Que Horror!  Approachability: 9/10 (Super campy... more

"Where's it at, Monistat?" Approachability: 6/10 (More satirical than scary) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore, Violent Misogyny Up Next: The Day of... more

How hard is it to hide from a tractor-trailer? Approachability: 5/10 (TROMA movie on a cocaine budget) Content Warnings: Animal... more

What's more realistic? The cartoon snake or Jon Voight's Paraguay accent? Special Guest: Jen Brown https://brownrecluseproductions.com/ Approachability: 8/10 (Super goofy... more

"Mommy, where do kittens come from?" Approachability: 4/10 (Weird, tense and super gross revenge tale) Content Warnings: Sexual Harrassment/Violence; Body... more

Let's give Heather some love. Special Guests: Pablo Escobar & Paul Jordan of the Scared Gay! podcast   Approachability: 6/10 (Very... more

Don't sleep and drive. Approachability: 8/10 (Bollywood thriller w/low budget SFX but high budget musical numbers) Content Warnings: Jump scares/sudden... more

Wait… what? Special Guest: Sarah Maria Griffin https://twitter.com/griffski Approachability: 8/10 (More fever dream than horror film) Content Warnings: Jump scares,... more

They for real filmed a zombie fighting a shark. Approachability: 2/10 (Super gory and campy zombie-fest) Content Warnings: Extreme blood/gore;... more

Special Guest: Glen Cullen https://flinchingwithdelight.com/ Approachability: 8/10 (Comedy meta-horror, not that scary, but very heart-felt) Content Warnings: Blood, jump scares,... more

Not for the faint (or even the strong) of heart. Approachability: 1/10 (Intense and explicit. Could be very triggering re:... more

Never look a tonguehorse in the mouth. Special Guest: Dan McCoy https://whiskeyflicks.com/ Approachability: 5/10 (Gory but also 80s-style campy) Content... more

You're *such* a gemini. Approachability: 6/10 (Stilted, but campy/fun splatter flick) Content Warnings: Animal death, child death, jump scares, blood/gore... more

Busby Berkeley in the Amazon Approachability: 10/10 (G-Rated monster picture) Content Warnings: it's as approachable as anything Up Next: Madhouse... more

Always read the contract. Approachability: 4/10 (Tightly-wound imprisonment thriller.) Content Warnings: sexual assault. stalking, gaslighting, suicidal ideation, imprisonment Up Next:... more

A strong case for eyebrow-threading and Invisalign Special Guest: Symphony Sanders Approachability: 9/10 (Both of ‘em: classy and spooky.) Content... more

The nail in the coffin of the 1990s Rom-com Special Guest: Janina Matthewson https://twitter.com/j9andif Approachability: 1/10 (It’s a brilliant film,... more

I'll just have a salad. Thanks. Approachability: 7/10 (Horror-light; but still a dark comedy touching on tough things) Content Warnings:... more

Hellraiser on a space ship. Approachability: 3/10 (Super gory ghoul-fest on a spaceship) Content Warnings: Blood/gore, Body Horror, Suicide, Existential... more

Welcome to the Wolf Man Cinematic Universe Special Guest: Angela Pierce http://twitter.com/AngelaPierceNY Approachability: 10/10 (Some people die, I guess?) Content... more

This is why I stay at hotels and not Airbnb. Approachability: 1/10 (Not at all for the horror squeamish. Nope.... more

[ominous singing in a foreign language] Approachability: 9/10 (Stage-play scary; not really horror movie scary) Content Warnings: burning witches; knife... more

This week, we have: the Mystery Machine, a Confusing Mermaid, and Freaky Country Folks. Approachability: 7/10 (Most of the horror... more

The Cenobytes are probably really into Wordle. Approachability: 2/10 (Maggots and roaches and blood, oh my!) Content Warnings: Gore, Body... more

The hockey mask debut-eth. Special Guest: Kyra Sims https://twitter.com/lilymischief Approachability: 4/10 (It's a slasher: it's a creeper doin' creative kills)... more

"Demons" is Italian for zombie-vampires Approachability: 2/10 (Gory zombie/vampire/demon hybrid w/a bitchin’ soundtrack) Content Warnings: Extreme gore/violence, Body horror Up... more

Man, fuck these kids... AND their corn. Approachability: 6/10 (Splattery but not gory; scary but not tense) Content Warnings: Knifings;... more

Sometimes more is less. But sometimes more is MORE. Approachability: 4/10 (A stylish smorgasbord of tropes and traumas) Content Warnings:... more

Where's Waldo? But make it creepy. Approachability: 7/10 (More of a family drama and mystery thriller, but those ghost faces... more

Mike's Hard Disney Cartoon Approachability: 9/10 (Violent but still a kid’s movie w/ a happy ending) Content Warnings: Cartoon animal... more

And the Oscar for Doing The Most goes to… Approachability: 9/10 (More of a campy thriller than a horror.) Content... more

Don't read about it. Don't worry about being scared/grossed out. Just watch it. Approachability: 9/10 (Smart, complicated, and fun comedy)... more

Just say no to blood, kids. Special Guest: Symphony Sanders https://twitter.com/SymphonySanders Approachability: 9/10 (Artsy Fartsy; not Scary Mary.) Content Warnings:... more

Never trust neighbors or actors. Approachability: 7/10 (Tense scary, not gory scary or jumpy scary.) Content Warnings: Sexual Assault, Gaslighting... more

The first year of high school is always the roughest. Approachability: 5/10 (Super violent (but also super fun) proto-Hunger Games)... more

She's my mother's sister's girl. Special Guest: Gennifer Hutchison https://twitter.com/GennHutchison Approachability: 4/10 (Weird and disorienting more than scary) Content Warnings:... more

Everyone has that super annoying little brother. Approachability: 1/10 (Gory, scary, violent, tragic, creepy, dumb. And kind of non-stop about... more

A good plumber is hard to find. Approachability: 3/10 (Creepy ghost child; Child death; Jump scares) Content Warnings: Bloodless but... more

Whitney believed children are our future, but she never met THESE kids. Special Guest: Andrew Scahill https://www.adscahill.com/ Approachability: 8/10 (It's... more

Spoiler: the sneering, lion-poaching, French aristocrat turns out to be the baddie. Approachability: 8/10 (Intense like a thriller, not scary... more

The piranhas escaped enclosure by swimming through the plot holes. Approachability: 6/10 (Goofy but plentiful gore) Content Warnings: Blood/Gore; Aquaphobia;... more

What to expect when you're expecting (a werewolf baby) Approachability: 8/10 (Horror fairy tale w minimal scares) Content Warnings: Child... more

Come here and let mommy clean you up. Approachability: 6/10 (Psych thriller with a body horror climax) Content Warnings: Body... more

I swear I did NOT SEE what the NAZI did. Approachability: 2/10 (So tense, so bloody) Content Warnings: Graphic violence,... more

Thinking of going vegetarian? Start here. Approachability: 1/10 (The mouth noises are a lot, but so is the body horror)... more

Don't waste time on broody ex-boyfriends. Approachability: 5/10 (More tragic than scary, but still a few blind corners & creepy... more

You think your N95 mask is uncomfortable... Special Guest Brie Williams https://twitter.com/briezillionaire Approachability: 7/10 (Creepy more than anything, but also... more

Zombies be shoppin'. Approachability: 5/10 (So much blood and gore, but it's not super real-looking) Content Warnings: Lots of blood... more

ET fucks around and finds out. Special Guest: Andrew Scahill https://www.adscahill.com/ Approachability: 4/10 (Very funny but also very scary and... more

There's no reason to own a clown doll, okay? Approachability: 3/10 (More gross than gory. But very gross. And spooky... more

Sure, their food is okay, but what does Pizza Hut think about abortion? Special Guest: Joseph Fink https://twitter.com/PlanetOfFinks Approachability: 5/10... more

The key word here is "experimental." Special Guest: Symphony Sanders https://twitter.com/SymphonySanders Approachability: 9/10 (More arthouse than horror film) Content Warnings:... more

Spoiler: in the end, it turns out Connecticut is terrible. Special Guest: Angela Pierce http://twitter.com/AngelaPierceNY Approachability: 7/10 (No blood/jumps. TW... more

"What the fuck am I doing? I don't know." - John Carpenter, on writing this film. Special Guest: Tyler Jensen... more

It all depends on how much you like Sondheim. Special Guests: Stacie Ponder & Anthony Hudson https://www.gaylordsofdarkness.com/ Approachability: 9/10 (It's... more

I'm not sure this is a union-sanctioned theater retreat. Approachability: 8/10 (Silly, low budget. Minimal scares, blood and creep-factor) Content... more

LA Crime Noir meets Clive Barker gore Approachability: 4/10 (The gore might be off-putting; but no real jumpscares) Content Warnings:... more

Kids, don't have kids. Approachability: 10/10 (Campy, stagy. Not scary at all, maybe a touch creepy) Content Warnings: Suicide (off-screen),... more

Let's explore ALL the found footage tropes! Special Guest: Janina Matthewson https://twitter.com/j9andif Approachability: 6/10 (Lots of scary masks and creep... more

An early 00's British comedy matryoshka doll Approachability: 9/10 (Brief hyper-comedic gore; no real scares to speak of) Content Warnings:... more

If you're gonna bleed, be fabulous about it Approachability: 6/10 (Slasher with lots of stylish, fake blood) Content Warnings: Sexual... more

The medium is the messiah. Approachability: 4/10 (Lots of gory body horror, but done with really cool 80s practical effects)... more

Perfectly absurd; Absurdly perfect Special Guest: Sarah Maria Griffin https://twitter.com/griffski Approachability: 7/10 (The excessive blood & violence is ridiculously cartoonish)... more

The campy NY art-noir you didn't know you needed Special Guest: Noah Fecks https://www.instagram.com/noahfecksisawesome Approachability: 7/10 (Non-gory crime thriller with... more

It's a tough watch, but don't lose your head about it. Approachability: 1/10 (Tragic as hell, gory, creepy. Lots of... more

Sure! I'd love to go murder camping again! Special Guest: Adal Rifai https://twitter.com/adalrifai Approachability: 4/10 (Not super bloody, but lots... more

The Matrix meets Twilight meets Anton Chekhov Special Guest: Symphony Sanders https://twitter.com/SymphonySanders Approachability: 7/10 (It's a violent action film, rather... more

Diminishing returns in this horror anthology Approachability: 4/10 (Pretty basic horror tropes, but still bloody and jumpy) Content Warnings: Slasher-style... more

The title contains a complete plot summary. Approachability: 8/10 (Not scary; not gory. Kind of creepy but mostly silly.) Content... more

Your standard coming-of-age cannibal flick Approachability: 1/10 (The graphic gore & intense body horror is A LOT) Content Warnings: Animal... more

Beatles stans with mind control Approachability: 8/10 (Creepy thriller; not bloody or jumpy) Content Warnings: Animal harm, Domestic Violence, Creepy... more

There's no Oscar for Best Use of Helium Voice Special Guest: Dan McCoy https://whiskeyflicks.com/ Approachability: 8/10 (more suspense than horror;... more

30-year-old teenagers make a series of terrible decisions Special Guest: Joe Lipsett https://twitter.com/bstolemyremote Approachability: 4/10 (classic slasher: blood, stabbing, jump... more

[facepalm emoji] Approachability: 9/10 (dopey as all-get out) Up Next: I Know What You Did Last Summer (1999) https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/i-know-what-you-did-last-summer ... more

Low-budget masterpiece is still relevant, still freaky. Special Guest: Alyssa Wong https://twitter.com/crashwong Approachability: 5/10 (the effects are dated, but it's... more

Capitalism drags yet another millennial to hell. Special Guests: Andrew & Seynique of We Die First https://twitter.com/wediefirstpod Approachability: 2/10 (it's... more