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The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong
The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong
Mark Chrisler

A podcast about exactly what it says it is: examining the bad ideas, mistakes and accidents that misshaped our world.

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Episodes

It's Never Over

I had a nice, fluffy, inconsequential story to tell you this week. Instead, here's this. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Go to... more

19 Nov 2024 · 52 minutes
1876 (Redux)

This is the story of the worst American presidential election (so far (arguably)).  Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You too... more

05 Nov 2024 · 1 hour, 3 minutes
The Ghost of Cock Lane

A ghost story, a murder mystery, a romance, a tragedy, a farce and a con job, all rolled into one.... more

22 Oct 2024 · 1 hour, 17 minutes
The Ghost Ship

The great thing about a ghost ship is that you can blame the ocean for your pants being wet. Visit our Patreon here.... more

08 Oct 2024 · 58 minutes
Introducing: History Daily

On History Daily, we do history, daily. Every weekday, host Lindsay Graham (American Scandal, American History Tellers) takes you back in time to... more

01 Oct 2024 · 24 minutes
Venus in Transit, Part Three

Just one more story to go. Unless we're forgetting somebody... Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You too can get ad-free,... more

24 Sep 2024 · 57 minutes
Venus in Transit, Part Two

Second verse same as the first. A little bit louder and a little bit worse. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here.... more

10 Sep 2024 · 59 minutes
Venus in Transit, Part One

In 1761, the world joined together to complete the most difficult, ambitious, important scientific project in history. It... didn't go... more

27 Aug 2024 · 59 minutes
Crackpots

Some things are ordered and some are chaotic. This story is neither. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You too can... more

13 Aug 2024 · 43 minutes
It's a Secret 3 Everyone

We're opening up the vault and giving you access to three stories from our secret feed. If you like what... more

30 Jul 2024 · 52 minutes
A Cut Above

What's on the menu this week? Dick jokes and heresy, of course! Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You too can... more

16 Jul 2024 · 52 minutes
Everyone Can Sing

Here's a special 4th of July episode designed to make everybody happy and not upset anyone at all in anyway. Want... more

02 Jul 2024 · 1 hour, 13 minutes
Listen Now: Legacy “J. Edgar Hoover”

From Wondery and Goalhanger Podcasts, Afua Hirsch and Peter Frankopan tell the wild stories of some of the most extraordinary men... more

24 Jun 2024 · 12 minutes
The Inconstant Moon

We're ending this pseudo-series on the golden age of hoaxes with the original mass media fake that started it all. Visit our Patreon... more

18 Jun 2024 · 1 hour, 5 minutes
Of Heroes and Hoaxes

Napoleon is dead, the cry went out. But he wasn't. Want a month trial of Shopify for just a dollar? Grab... more

04 Jun 2024 · 52 minutes
Ducks, Half Sold

In the 18th century, something started happening to the news... Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You too can get ad-free,... more

21 May 2024 · 50 minutes
Two Islands

Two classic Constant episodes, re-edited, re-recorded and re-produced. "People this Isle" and "Do Good, Carefully." Want a month trial of Shopify... more

07 May 2024 · 50 minutes
Comfortably Numb, Part 3

Many men tried to claim the invention of anesthesia as their own. It didn't work out well for any of... more

23 Apr 2024 · 1 hour, 9 minutes
Comfortably Numb, Part 2

What does every wild west shootout in every movie you've ever seen have to do with the history of anesthesia?... more

09 Apr 2024 · 45 minutes
Comfortably Numb, Part 1

The war between humanity and its oldest, archest of enemies: pain. Get 50% off by navigating to factormeals.com/constant50 Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start... more

26 Mar 2024 · 48 minutes
Like a Son

He was the most beautiful man in the history of Athens. And he nearly destroyed it. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon... more

12 Mar 2024 · 56 minutes
Whoa Baby

Until recently, our understanding of where babies came from was hazy. Which made it easy for a certain class of... more

27 Feb 2024 · 54 minutes
Let's Talk About Sex, Babies (Remix!)

We're remaking one of the all-time classic Constant episodes, this time with decent audio! Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Visit our Patreon here. You... more

13 Feb 2024 · 56 minutes
The Holy She, Part 2

Did a woman secretly manage to become pope, only to be revealed by a badly mistimed labor in the streets... more

30 Jan 2024 · 50 minutes
The Holy She, Part 1

Did a cross-dressing woman manage to worm her way into the papacy, and was she discovered when she gave birth... more

16 Jan 2024 · 42 minutes
Presenting: Historical Blindness

Find Historical Blindness at https://www.historicalblindness.com/ or wherever you listen to this podcast. We'll be back with a new year of... more

02 Jan 2024 · 1 hour, 8 minutes
A Very BMJ Christmas

They celebrate the season a little differently down at The British Medical Journal. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online... more

19 Dec 2023 · 1 hour, 4 minutes
99% Conspicuous

The James R. Thompson Center is the most hated building in the city of Chicago. And it has to be... more

05 Dec 2023 · 1 hour, 15 minutes
Rock Bottomless, Part 2

We can go deeper. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/theconstant and get on your way to... more

21 Nov 2023 · 1 hour,
Rock Bottomless, Part 1

This week, we're going deep. How deep? No one knows! Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Get 15% off your MasterClass subscription by... more

07 Nov 2023 · 53 minutes
The Werewolf

A beastly history of the beasts that stalked Europe for centuries. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a... more

24 Oct 2023 · 1 hour, 7 minutes
Psych Out, Pt 3: Repeat After Me

In which a psychic horse causes the greatest crisis in scientific history. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start hiring Want a month trial of... more

10 Oct 2023 · 1 hour, 29 minutes
Introducing: Southern Gothic

The Baynard Mausoleum is the oldest surviving structure on Hilton Head Island, but eerily, the family once interred inside is... more

07 Oct 2023 · 30 minutes
Psych Out, Pt 2: Pick a Card

In which a talking, psychic horse gives JB Rhine the idea for a new field of science: parapsychology. Thanks HelloFresh! Go... more

19 Sep 2023 · 1 hour, 26 minutes
Psych Out, Pt 1: Lady Wonder

A horse is a horse, unless, of course, that horse can tell the future. Thanks HelloFresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/50constant and use code 50constant... more

05 Sep 2023 · 1 hour, 23 minutes
Everything Aristotle Has Said is Wrong & The Reflex

Early episodes of this show sound like crap! So this week we're remaking a couple of old favorites. Thanks HelloFresh! Go... more

22 Aug 2023 · 55 minutes
The One from Nowhere

In 1900, three lighthouse keepers went missing, starting a phony mystery that long concealed a real one. Go to drinkAG1.com/constant to... more

08 Aug 2023 · 53 minutes
Burning Men

There's a party in 14th Century Europe, and everybody's invited! Thanks HelloFresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/constant50 and use code constant50 for 50%... more

25 Jul 2023 · 56 minutes
The Captain and The Serpent, Part 2

What's that out there in the distance? A fish? A whale? A SEA SERPENT?! No, it's just the conclusion to... more

11 Jul 2023 · 1 hour, 6 minutes
The Captain and The Serpent, Part 1

Murder! Monsters! Lifeboats! This one's got it all. Go to drinkAG1.com/constant to get a FREE 1-year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D... more

27 Jun 2023 · 1 hour, 10 minutes
Red Mercury, Part 2

Buckle up your crazy belts, 'cuz we're going off the rails on a crazy train to crazy town! Thanks Athletic Greens.... more

06 Jun 2023 · 1 hour, 17 minutes
Red Mercury, Part 1

In 2004, three men were arrested in London. Their crime was attempting to purchase material to build a nuclear bomb.... more

23 May 2023 · 56 minutes
A Pickle for The Knowing Ones

This is The Tale of Lord Timothy Dexter: The Luckiest Asshole in History. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online... more

09 May 2023 · 57 minutes
I Have Come from Hell

On the morning of May 8th, 1902, Ludgar Sylbaris awoke in jail alone. And then the world ended. This episode is... more

25 Apr 2023 · 1 hour, 14 minutes
Happy Place

The special spring break surprise is here! Join Heather for a journey into the sad side of the happiest place... more

11 Apr 2023 · 1 hour, 3 minutes
This Means War (Volume 2)

Watch yourself: the wars only get stupider from here. Want a month trial of Shopify for just a dollar? Grab it here! Visit www.omahasteaks.com and... more

28 Mar 2023 · 55 minutes
This Means War (Volume 1)

At its best, war is terrible, wasteful, regrettable and necessary. At its worst, it's just fucking stupid. Check out: indeed.com/theconstant now to start... more

14 Mar 2023 · 51 minutes
The Earliest Englishman (Part 2)

A mystery story where one of the suspects writes mystery stories? How could you go wrong! Visit www.omahasteaks.com and enter "theconstant" at check... more

28 Feb 2023 · 1 hour, 19 minutes
The Earliest Englishman (Part 1)

In December, 1912 a lawyer and a paleontologist made an amazing announcement: The missing link was real, the missing link... more

14 Feb 2023 · 55 minutes
Link Missing (Part 2)

After Charles Darwin published Origin of Species, the scientific world spent the next fifty years searching for an alternative theory... more

31 Jan 2023 · 1 hour, 35 minutes
Link Missing (Part 1)

What is a man? A miserable pile of secrets, of course. But in the 19th century, a debate arose about... more

17 Jan 2023 · 1 hour, 23 minutes
Are Whales Fish?

To start off the year, we're looking back at an old favorite that plays a significant part in an upcoming... more

02 Jan 2023 · 1 hour, 8 minutes
The War on Christmas

Merry Christmas, you filthy animals. This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/theconstant... more

20 Dec 2022 · 1 hour, 28 minutes
It's The Little Things (Volume 2)

One more round of short stories, about little things, that had big consequences. This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by... more

06 Dec 2022 · 1 hour, 3 minutes
It's a Secret to Everyone (Volume 3)

It's Mark's birthday, it's The Constant's birthday, and it's Thanksgiving. In celebration we're opening up The Secret Feed vault and... more

22 Nov 2022 · 51 minutes
It's The Little Things

We're keeping things simple this week. Or that was the plan at least. But sometimes the simple things are friggin'... more

08 Nov 2022 · 57 minutes
Sister Pact

We've got a special Halloween episode for you, full of demonic possessions, dark conspiracies and sexy nuns. What more could... more

25 Oct 2022 · 1 hour, 45 minutes
The Constant Presents: History Daily

Good history, well-told, five days a week. That's History Daily. So get on it, y'buncha jagbags! How about a free fourteen... more

18 Oct 2022 · 44 minutes
The Foolkiller Pt 7: Or Rewrite History

After more than four years of research and nine hours of episodes, we're finally at the TRUE conclusion to The... more

04 Oct 2022 · 2 hours, 23 minutes
The Foolkiller Pt 6: Might Solve a Mystery

Just when I think I'm out, they pull me back in. How about a free fourteen day trial of Shopify? Grab it... more

20 Sep 2022 · 59 minutes
Heart of Darkness

This is the story of two diseases, and two theories about where one of them came from. Want 15% off an... more

06 Sep 2022 · 1 hour, 20 minutes
The Greater Good

This is a story about the search for goodness in the world. Naturally, it ends tragically. Get $75 credit to upgrade... more

23 Aug 2022 · 1 hour, 12 minutes
Cassandras

Three high ranking American financial officials tried to warn the world about the 2008 financial collapse. But they were ignored,... more

09 Aug 2022 · 1 hour, 21 minutes
Do You Think He Saur Us?

Beneath lackluster Disney movies and schlocky cable reality television lies an untold true story: the secret brontosauruses of Africa, and... more

26 Jul 2022 · 1 hour, 14 minutes
Chicago

After every American mass shooting, the gun debate is drowned in one question: What about Chicago? Today, we're answering it. "How... more

12 Jul 2022 · 1 hour, 13 minutes
Goat Balls

This story is about music, radio, medicine, politics, power, money, people and... goat testicles. Get $75 credit to upgrade your job... more

28 Jun 2022 · 1 hour, 2 minutes
The Hadacol Boogie

There are lots of stories about drugs that changed the medical industry. But here's one about a drug that changed... more

14 Jun 2022 · 46 minutes
Shipwreckless

In 1867, The Eliza set out to sea with a fresh crew, a full hold and fair weather. Yet no one expected... more

31 May 2022 · 40 minutes
The Constant Medicine Show (Pt 2)

Step right up, step right up! We've got the cure for what ails you: more podcasts! How about a free fourteen... more

17 May 2022 · 1 hour, 1 minute
The Constant Miracle Tonic All Night Medicine Show!

Feeling run down, run out or run around? Well friend, I've got the cure for you! Step right up for... more

03 May 2022 · 55 minutes
The Cockatrice

In 1474, the people of Basel tried, convicted and sentenced to death a rooster, in one of the strangest court... more

19 Apr 2022 · 1 hour, 5 minutes
The Forbidden Experiment

If you really want to know what language people originally spoke, all you have to do is the unspeakable. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/233597995_Royal_Investigations_of_the_Origin_of_Language Get $75... more

05 Apr 2022 · 1 hour, 11 minutes
Babble On

The search for the original language, the true language, the language of God and Adam and Enoch, begins today. Continue your... more

22 Mar 2022 · 1 hour, 16 minutes
What Goes Up (Pt 5)

Will humanity ever successfully fly? No. Find out why, on this, the conclusion of our five part series on people... more

08 Mar 2022 · 1 hour, 22 minutes
What Goes Up (Pt 4)

The doe-eyed optimism of Rousseau! The biting cynicism of Baron von Grimm! And a whole bunch more people attempting to... more

22 Feb 2022 · 56 minutes
What Goes Up (Pt 3)

On the third part of our survey of failed fliers, we've drawing from all walks of life: a peasant and... more

08 Feb 2022 · 1 hour, 12 minutes
What Goes Up (Pt 2)

What do a professor, a heretic, a clockmaker, a barber, a cantor, a laborer, an architect, an alchemist and a... more

25 Jan 2022 · 1 hour, 6 minutes
What Goes Up (Pt 1)

You've heard of The Wright Brothers, the first people to fly. Maybe you've heard of Alberto Santo Dumont, too. Arguably... more

11 Jan 2022 · 1 hour,
Dance with The Devil in The Pale Moonlight

New Year, New You, New Constant. Season 11 begins Tuesday, January 11th. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

09 Jan 2022 · 2 minutes
Men of Stone (Pt 2)

Throughout the 19th Century, The United States was absolutely barraged by tales of petrified stone men: ancient giants, missing links,... more

21 Dec 2021 · 1 hour, 17 minutes
Men of Stone (Pt 1)

In 1897, a Montana prospector discovered something valuable in The Missouri River. Not gold, not silver, not even copper. It... more

07 Dec 2021 · 57 minutes
It's a Secret to Everyone, Too

Our second annual dive into the hidden world of The Constant Secret Feed.Continue your education via University of California Irvine... more

30 Nov 2021 · 1 hour, 7 minutes
Something from Nothing

Be the most popular kid on the block with these fantastic new tricks! Produce bees from lions! Frogs from mud!... more

16 Nov 2021 · 1 hour, 43 minutes
Lucy Lightfoot

Lucy Lightfoot went missing in 1831, and was later found alive and well... in 1364. Listen to this episode through... more

02 Nov 2021 · 51 minutes
Long Story Short (Pt 3)

A long story, made short, and then long again, is finally ready to end. Join us for part three, the... more

19 Oct 2021 · 1 hour, 26 minutes
Long Story Short (Pt 2)

In part two, we've got an enormous naval disaster, a long-shot con-job, some far-fetched inventions, and some of the most... more

05 Oct 2021 · 1 hour, 9 minutes
Long Story Short (Pt 1)

Humanity has tackled a lot of hard problems over the last few thousand years--from medicine to physics to splitting tips.... more

21 Sep 2021 · 1 hour, 6 minutes
Trivial

Today we've got a potpourri of smaller stories: invasive bird spies! Cunning robberies! Booby traps! MULES! Listen in!Check out this... more

07 Sep 2021 · 55 minutes
Are Whales Fish?

In 1818, New York City was gripped by the trial of the century. At stake was $75, the regulation of... more

24 Aug 2021 · 1 hour, 8 minutes
Walking on Sunshine

There is an episode of this show entitled "In The Air Tonight", but make no mistake: this episode is the... more

10 Aug 2021 · 1 hour, 3 minutes
Holy Toledo Jefferson Correction

I made a big enough oopsie in the last episode, Holy Toledo, that I think it deserves a formal correction... more

02 Aug 2021 · 9 minutes
Holy Toledo

Ohio versus Michigan! It's a familiar rivalry. But this week, it's not a football game: it's a war, fought over... more

27 Jul 2021 · 1 hour, 12 minutes
Map & Territory

A perfect map is a useless map, but imperfect maps are how myths get made. Get $75 credit to upgrade... more

13 Jul 2021 · 56 minutes
Start Here (100th Episode!)

For our 100th episode, we're going back and remastering some of very first stories. If you're looking for a place... more

29 Jun 2021 · 43 minutes
The Lead Age

Clair Cameron Patterson discovered the true age of the Earth, and in the process, the greatest environmental catastrophe in human... more

15 Jun 2021 · 1 hour, 17 minutes
It's a Date

How old is the world? There're only fifteen or twenty ways to find out!Get $75 credit to upgrade your job... more

01 Jun 2021 · 1 hour, 11 minutes
Death Rays (Part Two (Electric Boogaloo))

Here it is! The Big Bad Boys of Death Ray History: Axis vs. Allies, Marconi vs. Tesla, and barely anything... more

18 May 2021 · 1 hour, 17 minutes
Death Rays

This one does what it says on the tin: instantly kills you with a beam of indeterminate provenance! What other... more

04 May 2021 · 1 hour, 13 minutes
Don't Know Much About History

Nobody paid much attention to Jean Hardouin in 1729 when he said that all of history was faked. But since... more

20 Apr 2021 · 1 hour, 2 minutes
It's All a Lie

What if I told you everything you knew was a lie? Okay, well what if a 17th century French librarian... more

06 Apr 2021 · 52 minutes
Zoo Story

On March 8th, 1874, the animals escaped from The Central Park Zoo. Check out Don't Stop for Monkeys (https://dontstopformonkeys.weebly.com/), or else.Get... more

23 Mar 2021 · 1 hour, 5 minutes
Crackpots

Some things are ordered and some are chaotic. This story is neither.Get $75 credit to upgrade your job post at... more

09 Mar 2021 · 43 minutes
On The Rocks

What do the modern flat earth movement, the history of animal experimentation, the invention of civil engineering, ballet, pantomime, and... more

23 Feb 2021 · 55 minutes
How to Solve a Murder (pt 3)

We no longer make people walk hot coals, or swim witches, or touch dead bodies. But everything we know about... more

09 Feb 2021 · 1 hour, 27 minutes
How to Solve a Murder (pt 2)

On part two of this three part series on forensics, we're bridging the gap, between the ancient and modern means... more

26 Jan 2021 · 54 minutes
How to Solve a Murder (pt 1)

Fingerprints, DNA, blood spatter, ballistics. Before any of those forensic sciences, investigators and courts had a very different suite of... more

12 Jan 2021 · 1 hour, 10 minutes
Lick The Earth

For the last episode of 2020, we're returning to our fair city, Chicago, for the unlikely story of a hard-scrapple... more

15 Dec 2020 · 1 hour, 13 minutes
It's a Secret to Everybody

For The Constant's third birthday, here are three stories out of the secret feed. Medicinal gold, the story of theater's... more

01 Dec 2020 · 44 minutes
Deserted

In September of 1822, a ship carrying 70 immigrants left London bound for St. Joseph, a bustling city on The... more

17 Nov 2020 · 1 hour, 1 minute
Presidents in Bathtubs

How do you thread the needle between political and apolitical, frivolous and serious, fun and relevant, on this extremely stressful... more

03 Nov 2020 · 53 minutes
The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong
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The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong
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Description

In September of 1822, a ship carrying 70 immigrants left London bound for St. Joseph, a bustling city on The Mosquito Coast... more